Someone asked me to write about the love we almost had……
I’ve lived my life hoping you’ll be mine, my baby forever. I recall dreaming and fantasizing of what we could be. So I became obsessed with this dream. I was enchanted by your spell, you must have been a sorcerous because you did the impossible, when you gained my trust.
In as much as I try I can’t lay blame on you for the misery my heart endured for years when I lost you. I got a hole in my heart from some kind of emotional roller-coaster when you toyed with my feelings. I don’t blame you for not loving me the way the way I thought you would, seems my expectations were high.
You used to live in my mind and play with my heart. When we touched, I felt a rush, when we clutched it wasn’t much but it was enough for me to wonder what was in store for us, was it love or lust?
I can’t level the blame on you for hiding the truth from me, I know you know it could have torn me to shreds. I also know I would have come up with a lousy excuse not to believe you. Seems the lies kept me around as you could tell me a lie and show me the proof.
My heart pursued adventure and the mystery of what we could have been had me on a mammoth of a high, I didn’t want to imagine the hangover. I couldn’t picture life without you, my warmth in a storm, my peace when trouble knocked on our door. But I didn’t even have you, and sometimes I felt so lonely in your company. I blame you for my scarred heart that nearly shriveled up and dropped out when you left.
I admit that I was young and naïve and I blame you for leading me astray. You could have walked away when you realized I was stuck on you like a tick. But you held me close like a puppeteer pulled my strings as you wished. I blame you for continuing to burn my heart though you had countless opportunities to tell me the truth.
I now admit that we were never meant to be, and I expected a future you couldn’t give. I spent years loving you and caring about your wellbeing, even gave you a shoulder to lean when no one cared. I spent years giving you all my love, I don’t blame you for that. I blame myself for trying to force a something the universe was determined to keep apart. Maybe I was too much of a bore, a man incapable of giving you the best. I know I tried my best and I know you did too and maybe what happened to us was for the best.
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